To Buy or Not to Buy, that is the DVD

Living in Karachi can be quite frustrating for various reasons. Most of these reasons were listed in an article published in the Economist a few months ago that branded Karachi as the '4th most unlivable cities in the world.' This was due to problems related to Karachi's shortfalls in healthcare, education, sanitation, infrastructure, traffic congestion, not being able to handle its own weather, crime, terrorism, overall bad city planning, and a near-perpetual energy crisis. I got very sad and depressed after reading this article not only because I found out that I was living in the 4th most unlivable cities in the world but also because I found out so many things that I always knew were wrong here but was too naive to realize.

Yet, there are these little things in life that give solace to living here. I can list thousands but one of the most enlivening things, one which most of us take for granted, is the price and availability of movies on DVDs. Here in Karachi you can find an almost complete collection of all the Indian and English movies in many stores throughout the city for as little as Rs. 49 for a DVD. And there are a few stores that also sell Pakistani movies. However, even a simple act of going and buying a DVD can become a very hard decision given the many different types of 'movie prints' that each film is released on.

Let me explain: The first type of print that is released is the 'Camera' print. This print is 'produced' when a person takes a camera into the theater and films what is happening on the screen. Many movie store owners here also define this as a 'Watchable' print, although there is nothing 'watchable' about it (unless you are keen on watching shadows of people's heads sitting in the rows ahead and hear an occasional cough, babies crying, and people laughing). I guess the only people who like to watch this print are those who want to experience going to the theater while sitting in their living room. This is the worst print that you can get of a movie, but its also the one that comes out within hours of the theatrical releases.

Another print is called the 'Screener.' This is a decent print but it is mostly accompanied by a counter placed in the middle of the screen that is continuously ticking away numbers that really don't make any sense. This 'Screener' is the print that is given out by the production companies for screening purposes to award giving academies or censorship boards and its usually out even days before the movie is actually released in theaters. The video quality can range from being excellent to very good, but there are usually very blatant sound problems, such as the background noise being the main sound and the important dialogues that become background noise.

There is another print, called 'A Very Good Demo,' which I have not been able to understand as of yet. I think that they get this print by recording the movie direct from A/V out of the projector in the theaters. This is also a good-enough print but I have serious problems with it because it has some formatting issues and can ruin the whole experience of watching movies. Some of my friends are really keen on getting this print and they even enjoy it a lot, but I prefer not to watch them and wait for the movie to come out in the 'Master' print.

A 'Master' print is a pirated copy of the movie from its original DVD release. This is the best print that you can get and includes all the features that you would find on an original DVD, including subtitles in English, French, Spanish, Chinese etc. It may or may not contain the 'special features' section, but that really does not matter. The only problem with watching movies on this print is that by the time the movie gets out in this format, most of your friends have already seen it on either the 'Camera,' 'Screener,' or 'Demo' print (which for me are all 'Unwatchables').

Each movie comes out in each of the above explained prints and add to that is the new technology driven world of torrents and what-not. Many of the store owners make a complete fool out of you by downloading the movies off the net and then burning them on a cheap DVD. The result is that you get to watch a 'Compressed' print that is very pixilated and looks more like a VCD than a DVD.

So, keeping in mind all of the above, a typical conversation that occurs at a movie store goes something like this:

'Is "There Will be Blood" out?'

'Yes sir, its a 'Very Good Demo.''

'No 'Master?''

'No, but this is a 'Very Good Demo.'

'Is it watchable?'

'No. It's better than a 'Watchable.' Its a 'Very Good Demo.'

'Ok. I don't understand what that means, but ok. How about 'No Country for Old Men?''

'Yes its out. 'Master' print. But without the subtitles.'

'Does it mean that it's a 'Screener?'

'No. It's a 'Master' print. But no subtitles.'

'So this is watchable, then?'

'No no. It's not a 'Watchable.' It's a 'Master Without Subtitles*.'

'So, it's a 'Master Without Subtitles' and its unwatchable?'

'I don't know what that means, but ok.'

That's when my friend buys the 'Very Good Demo' print of 'There Will be Blood' and I get the 'Master Without Subtitles' for 'No Country for Old Men.' My friend does not buy 'No Country...' because he has already seen it in a 'Screener' print that was, for him, watchable, but for the movie store owner was, of course, better than a 'Watchable.'



*I did not mention this in my descriptions of the various prints because I had no idea that such a print existed before having the conversation at the movie store.